THINGS YOU NEED TO KNOW ABOUT DATING A MAN WITH KIDS…
If you are thinking about dating a man with a child or children, there are so many things to consider properly because a relationship with a man with kids is different from one without kids. His obligation and his duties are more. Before going into that relationship, the first thing to do is be sure it is what you want to do. After concluding you can skip to the list below.
HIS KIDS ARE HIS PRIORITY.
Before you go into this kind of relationship, know that his kids/children will always come first in his decision, his budget and everything including attention. Therefore if you are a very jealous person, this relationship may be considered un easy for you.
EXES WILL ALWAYS BE INVOLVED IN THEIR LIVES.
This is something you can never change because his Ex will always be involved in his/her children’s life. She is the baby mama also known as mother of his children. As much as you don’t want to have a man dealing with his ex, when dating a man with children, this is one thing you have to cope/ deal with.
DON’T MEET HIS KIDS YET
When dating a man with kid/children, do not meet his kids yet. Be sure he had told them about you and plans on extending whatever is going on between you both to a better level. Until this is certain, do not meet his children.
BE SURE HIS CHILDREN/KID WANTS TO SEE YOU.
Even if the man asked you to come to his house, be very sure his children are ready or willing to meet you because some children can be unbearable and annoying. Therefore you need to respect their decisions.
KNOW YOUR BOUNDRIES.
Being a step mom is not an easy job to begin. In the best way you can be, always be conscious of what you say or do to your step children because you are not their mom. Parenting is difficult either as a parent to your kids or to someone else’s. Therefore in the best way you can respect the children’s opinion, be patient and try to tolerate all form of vices if you desire to keep your home.
BALANCING IS DIFFICULT.
As a parent, your husband/boyfriend may find it difficult to balance emotions and attention between you and his kid. That is why you shouldn’t blame him or put him on the edge. As much as he loves you, his kid/kids will always be top on his list before your needs. This is a common trend you will have to adjust to with time.
EXPECT TO BE SPYED ON
Sometimes, some children can be very crazy. Some may intentionally spy on you in order to send reports to their father. Being spied on is unavoidable because it is a very serious matter among many step mom.
HAVE NO AUTHORITY
Sometimes you cannot make decision in the house. This means you have lost authority. The position of a step mom may mean you have to always abide by the rules instead of being in charge.
The list above is a combination of things you need you need to know before going into a relationship with a single father. It is challenging but if you can patiently learn to understand the children as well adopt the virtue of tolerance, you will have a peaceful and lovely family.